Tuesday, February 28, 2012

Ant music for sex people

He's been described as kitsch and camp, but I disdain the negativity of both of those words.
One of the most eccentric - how d'ya like that? - characters of the '80s, Adam Ant, is set to play the Trocadero Theater in Philadelphia Oct. 5. General admission tickets are $25. Call (215) 922-6888.
The show was originally supposed to be on Valentine's Day, but was rescheduled because of some snag with the release of a new album. Thought I saw something to that effect on Ant's website, but it's no longer there.
Hooo boy. I'm just hoping that's not Adam's bipolar disorder - which got him in some trouble in the '90s - flaring up.

One of three songs that charted in the U.S. top 40 for Stuart Goddard, aka Adam Ant. "Wonderful" was one of few bright spots for him in the '90s.

It was during the "Goody Two Shoes" period when I sat next to Denyel Trumbore in my seventh grade math class (wonder whatever happened to her?). She was obsessed with the guy. I was crushing on Denyel, so logically I sought out the unique post-punk sounds of Adam & The Ants, and Adam's more poppy, but equally quirky, solo material.
Dismiss the English new wave singer as a flash in the pan if you must, but Ant does have a distinctively oddball sensibility for both fashion and lyrics. I think of him as a theatrical missing link in music between David Bowie and Lady Gaga.

With the final Adam & The Ants record, Adam took Britain's New Romantic movement to a garish extreme.

Because of his accent, often slurred diction (which is ultra-weird considering all the acting he's done), and strange phrasing, half the time you swear he's singing in some unknown language (For being English, he does drop in quite a bit of French, and occasionally some Italian). In a bizarro, Adam Ant way, that's apropos for a man who sang about Antmusic, Ant people, and an insect nation.
Here's a medley of my favorite way-out-there lyrical Adam Ant-isms. Some are tongue-in-cheek. Some are witty. Some are mocking. Some don't make any friggin' sense at all!

"When I saw you kneeling,
crying words that you mean.
Opening the eyeballs, eyeballs
pretending that you're Al Green, Al Green."
--Goody Two Shoes

"An 18th century brain in a 21st century head."
--Room at the Top

"If I were kind and adoring,
how would that be?
Very boring.
Mr. press man, with your pen/knife,
always asking
about my sex life.
'And who with?'
'And how many times?'"
--Desperate But Not Serious

"We don't need to see what the butler saw,
or a mirrored room with a mirrored floor
All the sneaky looks gazing down on you
are no substitute for our rendezvous."

"So what's the point of robbery,
when nothing is worth taking?"
--Stand and Deliver

"This gold on the teeth's no sense at all.
It only matters when it's on the wall.
In the naughty north and in the sexy south,
we're all singin'.
I have the mouth."
--Ant Rap

"Have you ever stopped to think
who's slave and who's the master?
And remember this -
You don't need anything
after an ice cream."
--Car Trouble

"So unplug the jukebox,
and do us all a favor.
That music's lost its taste
so try another flavor - Antmusic"

These next 2, I think, are coded references to Ant's Romnichal heritage. They're more gypsies than indigenous peoples, but you get the idea.

"See a nation on its knees,
and its heritage dead.
See a nation needing 'civilization,'
just like a hole in the head.
One race! Today! One chant! Kick!
So now you're trying it on me,
but I'm aware of the plan.
To save the 'man' you have to kill the 'Indian,'
by simply shaking his hand."

"I feel beneath the white.
There is a red skin
suffering from centuries of taming.
And even when you're healthy,
and your color schemes delight.
Down below those dandy clothes,
you're just a shade too white."
--Kings of the Wild Frontier

"After nine years in the army,
they took away his brain.
They tattooed 'defect' on his brow,
and signed him up again."
--Nine Plan Failed

"Don't like your stare.
Don't like the arm in the air.
Your style is so brash,
and that silly mustache...
The evil I see
sends bad vibrations through me.
And oh what a square
with your diagonal hair."

"I could be religious if you didn't have to kneel down.
I could be religious if a god would say 'hello.'
I could be religious if an angel touched my shoulder.
I could be religious if they set the hymns to disco like this:
Holy, holy, holy,
Lord god almighty,
God in three persons,
Beloved trinity."
--The Idea

"I'll fill your bath with
the finest champagne.
I'll lick your skin dry.
I cherish your name.
The stakes get higher
as you dress sparsely.
So why did you have
to be so nasty?"
--Deutscher Girls

"Young Parisians are so French.
They love Patti S-mith."
--Young Parisians

"I'm a friend of Michael Jackson.
I'm a friend of Mr. Spock.
I'm a friend of Dr. Kildare.
I'm a friend of The Woodentops.
I'm an old friend of Charles Hawtrey.
I'm a friend of Michael Caine.
I'm a friend of Stanley Spencer.
I'm a friend of big John Wayne.
I'm a friend of Stevie Wonder.
I'm a friend of Eric Fromm.
I'm a friend of Bryan Ferry.
I'm a friend of Terence Stamp."

"They cut you in half with a gun,
and they give you a Band-Aid."
--Killer in the Home

"Ladies can be captains and ladies can be chiefs.
Just like glorious amazons,
Ann Bonny, Mary Read.

A woman's wrath hath no man,
and this all men must fear.
These were ladies from hell,
carving crimson careers."
--5 Guns West

"A thrill a day keeps the chill away.
Love like a dagger and a sound like a wi-mo-weh."
--That Voodoo

"When you're a
pirouetting, high kicking,
thigh slapping cruiser.
When you're a
hip grinding, spellbinding,
clean cut seducer."
--Friend or Foe

"Marriages are made in heaven,
so what the hell happened to mine?"
--Made of Money

"You fight so hard to get your name.
Please don't eat my leg, grandma.
On every tongue, in every brain.
Please don't eat my leg, grandma.
How in the hell can you complain?
What a bore you pop stars are.
Privacy's gone down the drain."
--Cajun Twisters

"Bang bang, you're dead!
Did not! Did too!
Stop diddy-bopping buddy
bouncing Betty on you.
Well I've been where I'm was going,
and it's not Tom of Finland."
--Vive Le Rock

"Miss Thing, please tell me why
he says 'child' when he meets another guy.
Turn it up.
Have your fill.
Up in the treble,
with a voice like a power drill."
--Miss Thing

"Whoops-in-a whoops-in (Dress it up)
Jam-jam jammerin' (Dress it up, Dress it up)
Yabba-yabba-ding-ding (Dress it up)
Delta hey max Nine
We will be fine
Apollo Nine
Even though NASA say
'Way out of line.'"
--Apollo 9

"Crouched and trembling
with hate,
mixes both and dies
both ways.
Going round the twist with
--Hell's Eight Acres

-One big truck that brings me camp over Medusa
-One miniature ration freeze boot lucky cross and cigarette lighter combined
-$500 in Rubles
-Ten packs of chewing gum
-Four lipsticks
-Five pairs of black nylons and a hula-hula skirt, buddy.
-One .38 special fully automatic
-Five clips of ammunition
-One week's concentrated emergency rations containing one, two, three sample size morphine syringes
-Two Phantoms
-One B-57
-Four Chinooks
-One 79 grenade launcher and a U.E.U.
Geez, a fella can have a real mean-dog of a weekend with all that stuff.
Yes sir, I've done some questionable things in my time
One more trick and you'll be dead.
No way to talk to a suicide head.
The chance to begin again.
Rebel in your time.
Have a better one,

--Rough Stuff

"Keep your friends real close,
and keep your enemies closer.
And be a real Hoss Cartwright on the ponderosa."
--Young, Dumb and Full of It

Monday, February 20, 2012

Souderton's Main Street Java jams on second Fridays

After seeing the standing room only crowd that showed up to see a bill featuring the local ensemble Earl & Raine at Main Street Java in Souderton, I had to blog about it.
From 6 to 9 p.m. the second Friday of the month, the fair trade coffee cafe at 117 N. Main St. offers free live music. Their paninis totally rock.
Here's Brian Medlin, who also played a set during the second Friday in February.

Wonder if it's this busy every month? Check out MSJ employee couple Ben and Hannah Randall, and Jessy Tomsko on March 9.

Tuesday, February 7, 2012

Found them on Facebook?

As the saga of what to do with 311 W. Main St. in Lansdale continues, there's a growing movement to the tune of 1,000+ petition signatures to turn the place into an all-ages music and arts venue.
The ethos behind it is to recapture the excitement of Lansdale's local music scene from the '90s. The long-gone Jumper's, near the Acme in Towamencin, was the epicenter of it, and since has been replaced by the VFW and the Third and Walnut.
It was definitely one of those you-had-to-be-there things. While I was not there, those who were can run down a laundry list of bands of local and international renown that have played shows in and around Lansdale.
Derek Calhoun of Boondocks Booking, and the originator of the Lansdale Local Facebook page, said at one of the 311 W. Main Street Task Force meetings that booking bands that young people will come to see will be easy.
While it remains to be seen if there's a viable business plan to get the building up to code and have such a venue survive long term, one glance at Lansdale Local and you notice that there is indeed a scene.
The next biggie at the VFW at 805 W. Second St. is $2 Bill Fest on Feb. 18 with an Animalhaus CD release party and bands Run For It, Troublesome, Stoked on Being Pumped, Bottom Feeder, Pleasant Living, Rough Justice, Get Railed, Dugout and Early Flight Home.
There's also info. on local music shows in Quakertown Feb. 23 and March 10 in Red Hill.
Social media's a beautiful thing, isn't it?